Make it clear it’s not their fault
Children often think it’s their fault if their parents argue, so take time to reassure them that this is not their fault at all. Explain gently that separation is a difficult decision for adults and that it happens to a lot of families.
Telling them it is tough at first but that things will get better, helps them to understand this is not forever; life and the family will move on.
Don’t play the blame game
However, tempted you are to put your side of the story across, it will not help the situation. Don’t make it about who has done what. The most important thing is helping them to adjust and show them that you are both still there for them.
Don’t tell them everything – just what they need to know
In most cases, children don’t need to know the finer details. Hearing about an affair, financial worries, and other arguments will only cause more anxiety.
Finally, reassure them. Not just in this conversation but throughout the process. Love, security, safety and clear boundaries throughout the divorce process will help your children to deal with the divorce the best way they can.