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Men exaggerate on first dates

So it’s finally all over. The decree nisi has become a decree absolute and it’s time to start a new chapter in your life and meet new people.

Dates are never easy. In the 21st Century we all bend over backwards to make them seem like  casual, informal affairs  but you can be sure that beneath the relaxed exteriors, most people will be hyperconscious of social expectations and all too aware of the need to make a good impression. Dates are not unlike job interviews in this regard: you have to try but seem like you’re not trying too hard.

Is it any wonder, then, that some people succumb to the temptation to exaggerate and bend the truth? This just in from the ‘doh!’ department: some men exaggerate and lie on first dates.

According to a survey by Roxypalace.com reported in the Mail, 63 per cent of men between the ages of 18 and 35 admit to having exaggerated their pay packets and more than half have been economical with the truth when it came to their careers. Other exaggerated their interest in animals and the arts. A decisive 55 per cent said they thought it was a good idea to tell women what they thought they wanted to hear when on a date.

Others, meanwhile, conveniently forget to mention divorces or children from earlier relationships – or even the fact that they are currently in a relationship! A third of the men surveyed admitted to trying to chat up women while already in relationships.

Bad behaviour all round. It is disrespectful and ultimately self-defeating to lie and mislead, and the men who do so will be found out, and hopefully sooner rather than later. But if I may play Devil’s Advocate for a moment, perhaps such men know that, just as they judge women on their looks, the women they meet will judge them on their social attributes: their clothes, their car, their job, their shoes, their personalities and yes, their relationship baggage too.

And of course, women are just as capable as the men of bending the truth on dates. Not only that, but the men know it.

To quote a spokesman for Roxypalace:

“It was particularly interesting to note that men also expected that their date may also be hiding the truth on a few subjects – so ultimately it was unlikely that anybody would have a totally honest full date – which may be understandable at such an early stage of a prospective relationship.”

How many relationships that start with lies and exaggerations over the restaurant table go the distance? Not that many I’ll bet.

The blog team at Stowe is a group of writers based across our family law offices who share their advice on the wellbeing and emotional aspects of divorce or separation from personal experience. As well as pieces from our family law solicitors, guest contributors also regularly contribute to share their knowledge.

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Comments(3)

  1. Findlay says:

    The best way to get to know someone before going on a first date is to use the video chat feature on one of the most popular sites such as attracion(dot)com.
    With this feature you can be sure what you see is what you get!

  2. Phil says:

    A little exageration can go a long way with a lady. I wouldn’t recommend total lies but it’s always good to try and impress your date.

  3. JamesB says:

    Why are women poor at parallel-parking? Because they are always being told that 4 is 6 inches ;-).

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