Middle-income families are staying together because they can’t afford to split

Divorce|Family|News|November 23rd 2012

New research from relationship charity Relate suggests that many middle-income families can’t afford to separate.

According to the survey of 2000 Relate counsellors, above-average earners find the cost of splitting up prohibitive. The costs involved  in divorce, moving into separate homes and childcare are all factors in such couples choosing to stay in the same home.

Counsellor Denise Knowles said:

“It is striking that we’re seeing couples who know they need to separate but can’t afford to”.

This is creating a ‘toxic environment’ according to Relate CEO Ruth Sutherland.

“Some couples are financially forced to continue living together, and this is ‘harmful to your children and permeates every other aspect of your life”.

Speaking to the Guardian, she laid the blame for this situation with the Coalition government’s austerity measures:

“Let’s be clear about the real cost of austerity. The impact of being in a relationship that isn’t working is toxic”.

She said living and childcare costs were not affordable even for those people in well-paid jobs, adding:: ‘I would not be surprised at all to see the problem creeping up the salary band.”

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  1. JamesB says:

    Hi, two things. To begin, as per the quote below, and above, this does show Relate’s bias towards splitting people up and nurturing the divorce industry.
    “Some couples are financially forced to continue living together, and this is ‘harmful to your children and permeates every other aspect of your life”.
    Secondly, I expect the couples mentioned will be happier in 5 years if they stay together than if they do not, relationships can and do go thtrough difficult times and improve, despite what the professionals who have a vested interest in splitting up couples say. There, for once I put it all in one post and not three.
    That said and out of respect for Marilyn, I do think being in a marriage can feel like being trapped and dont advise that, although I do advise long term relationships, which is what I am talking about. Regards, G.

  2. JamesB says:

    P.S. I felt trapped in my marriage with the sword of damicleese (spelling) of the family courts and being stitched up for money and contact hanging over me, best get out of them early, as I did, or not marry at all, or if you do don’t divorce or have a pre nup. I think the point is I feel sorry for those who feel trapped. I have lived 40 years, 35 of them not happily not married. I think, without a pre nup, it probably is an outdated institution. But with a pre nup it might be ok, better even, am thinking of doing it again, but am not sure, I don’t want to go before the evil family law courts again.

  3. JamesB says:

    I meant 35 of them happily not married and 3 or 4 of them of them happily married. I do rush these posts, perhaps I should do them all at the weekend.

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