Amicable divorce is becoming increasingly popular. When we think of divorce, more often than not, we think of screaming and shouting, tears falling over disagreement after disagreement, and ties being cut for good. But that isn’t always the case – sometimes couples really do just drift apart without any malicious intent.
In this guide, our divorce mediation experts share not only what it means to have an amicable divorce, but also how to do just that. With 7 expert tips, this amicable divorce checklist has everything you need to divorce peacefully.
The meaning of an amicable divorce
We understand that amicable and divorce don’t often go together, but that doesn’t mean they can’t.
An amicable divorce simply means working with your ex-spouse to have a peaceful and collaborative separation. The spouses agree to end the marriage with no blame or conflict. Of course, you don’t have to then go on to be the best of friends, but you are ready to communicate both honestly and respectfully to reach a fair settlement.
By working together, rather than against each other, you are more likely to divorce more quickly, cheaply, and effectively.
Understanding no-fault divorce
In 2022, the UK introduced a no-fault divorce system. Within this, couples can apply for their divorce either as a sole applicant or as joint applicants.
Either way, a no-fault divorce means that applicants can apply for a divorce application without the need to give a reason or prove fault, such as adultery leading to divorce.
What one of our solicitors says about how to divorce amicably
Sophie Croft, an Associate at our Newcastle family law office, says:
“Separating is a big life change for the entire family. Routines are disrupted, uncomfortable chats are needed, and frictions can naturally arise. However, we find that couples who can communicate effectively with one another have more amicable separations, reach a conclusion quicker (which in turn is more cost-effective) and go on to have a working relationship moving forward.
“This is particularly necessary where children are involved. Children’s lives change drastically when parents separate, and most of the time involves them having to get used to life in two separate homes. Children can easily get caught up in the middle of parental conflict, which they should be shielded from. Children want their parents to be happy and to get along, and parents should be mindful of this when they are feeling frustrated and may expose their children to conflict.
“Methods such as mediation and using parenting applications to communicate are great ways for separating couples to learn how to communicate effectively, plan together and work through their differences in a controlled and measured way.
“My advice is, be the bigger person, have your children’s interests at the forefront of your mind and in the long run, this mindset will pay off.”
How much does an amicable divorce cost?
The cost of divorce is always dependent on the complexity of your situation. If you choose to divorce through the Court, there is a Court application fee of £612 – either paid by the sole applicant or split if joint applicants.
On top of that, you will also have any solicitor’s fees and any complications like financial settlements or child arrangements.
If you choose to divorce outside of court, that will make your divorce cheaper. However, there are risks to a DIY divorce – like missing legal steps or not legally binding your settlement.
How to amicably divorce: A complete checklist
1) Open communication
We understand that communicating with your spouse after your separation may be a little awkward. However, being clear and honest about your feelings and thoughts brings transparency and trust that can’t be replaced.
2) Don’t point blame
Emotions certainly run high during separation, but pointing the blame never leads to anything positive. It simply makes achieving a peaceful divorce that much harder.
Sure, it may feel better to blame your ex, but more often than not, relationships break down after lots of tiny things build up over the months and years. Plus, not one single person is perfect. There are probably numerous things you have both done that have led to your marriage breakdown.
3) Seek legal advice
Even though you are having an amicable divorce, that doesn’t mean you don’t need legal advice. For example, our divorce experts will be able to inform you both of your rights and responsibilities.
We’ll listen to your unique situation and provide a tailored solution, so you have everything you need to confidently move forward with your life.
4) Consider alternative dispute resolution
If you and your ex-spouse decide you want to divorce outside of court, there are options that we can help with.
Here at Stowe Family Law, we provide:
Each of these options is far more private, calmer, and quicker than traditional divorce solutions. On top of that, they all prioritise communication that helps you both cooperate better to find the right solution to your situation.
Not sure which would be right for your needs? Our Client Care team will listen to your needs and recommend the best option.
5) Financial agreement
Even if your divorce is amicable, finances are always a tricky subject. Our financial settlement experts have years of experience in drafting fair divorce settlements.
Within your settlement, you should cover:
- Any assets, like property
- Pensions
- Savings
- Debt
Once this is all completed, it’s important to draft a consent order and have it approved by the Courts.
6) Parenting plan
The end of a marriage is even more intense when children are involved. Even in an amicable divorce, drafting a parenting plan is strongly recommended.
By doing this, both the parents and the kids have clarity over various responsibilities and how the kids will spend their time. These expectations ensure there is a reduction in misunderstandings, make life easier for the whole family, and peace is maintained despite all the changes.
7) Supportive network
As you can see, even though you may be divorcing amicably, that doesn’t make it any easier. This is still an incredibly stressful and overwhelming time, so it’s essential that you have a support system that you can rely on.
Whether that’s to help you with the kids or pet, be a shoulder to cry on, or have a laugh to take your mind off things, having loved ones you can rely on is invaluable.
The benefits of an amicable divorce
There are a number of benefits to choosing to divorce amicably – not just for you, but for the whole family.
- Cost-effective: Typically, legal fees and court costs are cheaper when both parties cooperate during the divorce process.
- Time saving: The reduction in one spouse dragging out the divorce usually means that you get divorced quicker. However, it is worth noting that even a no-fault divorce takes 26 weeks to complete.
- Reduced stress: By working together, both parties often find the divorce process less stressful due to the lack of disagreements.
- Mutual agreement over decisions: Having an amicable divorce means you and your ex-partner are more likely to reach a common agreement over decisions.
- Maintained relationships: You may not want to become friends with your ex-spouse, however, maintaining a civil relationship will be beneficial for future decisions and any children you are co-parenting.
- Smoother transition for kids: It’s no secret that children find divorce difficult too but having an amicable relationship with your ex may make things easier for your children as they see you being civil with each other, rather than fighting.
- Increased privacy: If you or the other party are deeply private people, choosing to have an amicable divorce ensures your disputes remain out of court, retaining confidentiality.
Let our experts guide you through the process
If you have decided that an amicable divorce is right for you, you’re in luck. We have some of the UK’s very best divorce lawyers, who will be more than happy to guide you through your amicable divorce.
We’ll listen to your unique situation and provide a tailored solution, so you can move forward with your life confidently. Get in contact with our experts today by calling 0330 107 2294 to begin your amicable divorce.
